Election 2010 Liveblog (sorry if it’s just swearing)

My tweets throughout the marathon, um, tv-watching session. Automatically generated, but now it’s finished I’ve gone through and fixed the times, which were out by an hour.

10:01:32 PM: Woah, exit poll way different from fivethirtyeight.com. Hope for the Lib Dems’ sake it’s not true.

10:05:00 PM: My ideal result: Lib-Lab coalition. Labour for ‘umbilical’ link to poor (as Guardian put it). Lib Dems to kick their arse on the dumb stuff.

10:07:09 PM: Looking like a long night. Thankfully I have a LOT of Haribo. Also ironing.

10:23:26 PM: @egwor Liveblog is somehow 15mins behind real-time. Also times are out by an hour. How odd.

10:46:26 PM: If they’ve given me false hope with this exit poll I am not going to be impressed.

10:56:34 PM: Have already eaten too much Haribo.

11:30:34 AM: Uh oh.

11:55:37 AM: World of Jeremy Paxman: Labour have been in power 13 years, so everything is their fault.

11:56:17 AM: Stop asking who’s won! What a stupid question.

1:07:40 AM: Shiiiiiiit.

2:06:33 AM: Was thinking about going to bed, but when even Nick Robinson won’t call it for the Tories…worth another hour, I think.

2:15:52 AM: The Haribo. I mourns it.

2:30:37 AM: This is chaotic.

3:45:23 AM: Conservative swing slowly creeping up. Apt.

3:46:53 AM: Holding out for the spectacular @DrEvanHarris, who’s in recount. Nail-biting.

4:03:20 AM: Conservatives hold Stratford-on-Avon. Big shock. Entirely possible they put blue ribbon on bollard.

4:06:27 AM: 0.7% swing from Con to LD. After old expenses-tainted Conservative MP stood down. Oh man.

4:24:27 AM: Oh, shit. Cons gain Oxford West – @DrEvanHarris out. 176 votes! That’s just bloody awful. Shit shit shit.

4:25:57 AM: Oh man it was the crazy Christian lady too.

4:49:37 AM: Right. Next general election, we form a rationalist army and descend on Oxford West. This has to be fixed.

5:04:04 AM: Oh god RT @big_ben_clock BONG BONG BONG BONG BONG

5:18:23 AM: Google Calendar just emailed to say I have no events scheduled today. Good job.

5:29:10 AM: Excellent use of ‘gloaming’ by David Dimbleby just now. Not bad at 05:30.

6:48:56 AM: Trying to stay up for Solihull result in solidarity with vote-counter @rug_mog. Struggling.

7:19:28 AM: Hey, Lorely Burt got Solihull. Nice.

7:29:07 AM: Ok nap time.

12:10:50 PM: Ok I’m back. What have I missed? The Smurfs aren’t in charge, are they?

12:11:31 PM: David Dimbleby’s still going. Kudos.

1:41:02 PM: #Radio2 just played The Winner Takes it All.

2:55:19 PM: #libdemrequirements 1) Electoral reform 2) All PMQs must end with ‘I agree with Nick’ 3) Bring back Firefly 4) Everyone gets a monkey.