Improve your sex life with magic tricks

Here is a very useful video on using magic tricks to pick up women. If you can make it through two minutes without wanting to crawl into a bucket and die, you're better than me:

Worth it for the utterly baffling final three seconds, though.

Take it from an ex-teenage-magician: you will not impress women by performing magic tricks. At all. Ever. Every male magician tries to envisage situations where the opposite is true, but it never happens. The closest I ever heard anyone get was David Copperfield, when he was mugged a couple of years ago. In front of his two female assistants, he showed the mugger his 'empty' pockets, despite having a wallet and mobile phone in them. Not very heroic, but not bad. Except the mugger then robbed the assistants, which totally ruined it.

Via Graham Linehan's twitter account, via Jonathan Ross, who's been vetting celebrity tweeters for the last couple of days. Graham Linehan = real. Eddie Izzard, Jeremy Clarkson and Jack Dee, not so much. He's apparently going to try and talk Russell Brand into joining, which would be entertaining. I miss my weekly dose of Brand insanity.