I have been watching BBC1’s ‘Mistresses’ for the past few weeks. It’s quite good, but has unexpectedly brought out the backseat psychotherapist in me. Don’t do that! Why would you possibly be attracted to him? That’s clearly a mistake. Ignore him. Now, look, if you do that you know what’s going to happen. You’re just overreacting - she wasn’t saying that at all. DON’T TEXT HIM. Dude, stop being a cretin or your wife will…too late, she did.

Basically, I want all conflict removed from the drama. They seem like such nice people, why can’t they just be happy? Really I just want to watch programmes in which attractive people struggle over a crossword while chatting about mistakes they nearly made.