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Wank-a-thon Update

The aforementioned wankathon took place last weekend at a London photographic studio. According to The Observer the ‘dozens’ of volunteers were mostly male. Well, yes. The studio contained:

Moroccan-style lanterns and cushions, red and gold drapes, ornate mirrors and erotic pictures and statuettes.

Ornate mirrors? I can’t decide whether looking up to see a reflected room full of guys namedropping M.C. Masturbation would be a complete turn-off or just very, very funny. Women and men were given separate rooms, although I don’t know what to make of this:

Gazing slightly nervously up the testosterone-heavy queue was a Czech student who gave her name only as Jana. The 27-year-old was not taking part but acted as an interpreter for her friend, Marcel Rimel, 20, one of four Czechs who had been sponsored to make the journey for this event.

I am entertained by the idea of Jana interpreting Marcel throughout. Also, in case people had trouble getting into the mood:

Lubricants and pornographic magazines were provided, as were bottles of water, boxes of Capri-Sun and

sorry, Paul

packets of Cadburys shortcake biscuits.

There was one protester: a male primary school teacher and, you guessed it, Christian. Because without religion there’s no need to obsess over other people’s orgasms. He held placards saying “People of Islington? Do you want this? Are you not offended?’ and ‘Masturbation or public degradation?'”. He also argued that his children might explode, or something, if they read about the event in the newspaper. Tom Hamilton’s response to this made me laugh.

Apparently one of the event’s security guards ‘quit on the spot’ when he found out what he was protecting. To be fair, he was in a sticky situation.

I can’t find anything on the competitive aspects, sadly. The event raised over £500 for HIV charities, and I’m assuming everybody went home happy.

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