Bad Language

There is a special type of swearing that gets used in some situations. Let’s say, for example, that you sit down on the sofa, place your evening meal next to you, and reach for a remote control. Out of the corner of your eye you notice the (stupid, useless, redundant) lap tray on which your food rests sliding from the seat. You make a grab for it, but fail and the plate shatters while food ends up upside down all over the floor. This, by itself, would not warrant any particularly special expletives. When, however, you didn’t even notice the ensuing mess due to having just plunged your hand into the centre of a very deep, fresh-from-the-oven pizza, new words practically spring into being of their own accord. Trust me on this.