Worrying about this evening

I’m photographing a friend’s daughter’s 21st birthday party this evening. Just as a favour rather than as a professional thing, but it should be interesting. I’m taking my old 50mm f1.8 lens and am trying to remember the best techniques for low-light photography. Since I had that memory card fail halfway around Paris the thought of anybody relying on me for photographs unnerves me, so I’ve made sure they know I can’t promise anything.

Earlier in the week the blindingly obvious thought occurred that this party would mean interacting with women my own age. Crap. I’ve been trying to think of the last time I was around a peer group of strangers, and I can’t remember. So I’m getting more and more nervous as the day goes on. My standard technique around strangers consists of: stand around looking awkward, fail to think of anything to say, go home and analyse exactly why everybody must hate me. So I’ll try not to do that! The life coaching techniques will hopefully help me avoid this particular pattern. As for talking to unknown women my own age, though, I honestly haven’t done that in years. Hell, I get nervous walking past them on the street, although I think that’s a hangup from school than any actual fear based in reality.

I’ve asked Nod to come with me for moral support, but I don’t know whether he’s free yet. A group of us went around to his house last night and played a male vs. female game in which you chose to answer gender-based questions, with more points awarded for answering questions about the opposite sex. Nod and I did far better on the women’s questions1 and I christened us ‘girly-geek-boys’, although I don’t know how impressed Nod was by that description. We still lost by quite a long way, however.

Anyway. Deep breaths. Caaaalm. It’ll be fine. It will.

  1. although we failed to name any of 10 “ways that women let a man know they like him” []