I Should be in Bed

Probably shouldn’t be writing this now, but, well, I am. We went out for Rachel’s birthday this evening, and Kate was there. I’ve been doing well for a while now in that regard – I only miss her when I’m excessively tired or hungry and have been getting on fine recently. Seeing her is a different matter, though, and when she’s laughing and joking it’s just bloody awful. I was thinking it might be ok tonight as it’s been a while since I’ve seen her, but it wasn’t. The best way I can deal with it is to generally ignore her, rude as that sounds. Well, not totally ignore, but only exchange pleasantries when necessary. The problem, quite frankly, isn’t that I’d get upset talking to her again, or that I want to get back together – she’s just so different now from how she used to be – it’s that I’d still enjoy talking to her, which is so much worse later on. So I would probably have come home tonight wishing the world would end, but Ben, Lynsey and Hel came back to mine to play games and I had a really good time and I’m feeling much better. So many thanks to them.

Tried to find an A4 whiteboard for Sully today. Failed. Must try harder.

Oh, and I want one of these.