Fun fun fun

I have returned! And guess what? I got an email from O2!

Dear Andrew,

Thank you for your enquiry.

I can confirm receipt of your postage certificate dated 5/12/03 [I had to fax this through twice, most recently on the 15th]

Unfortunately after checking the call data held on our records and of course your online bill I remain unable to offer any refund for either the handset or the invoice produced on the 28/12/03.

The call data shows various numbers that have been called repeatedly both before and after the 5/12/03.

This indicates that the numbers dialled are known to yourself and have actually been called since you state the item was returned.

Bearing this information in mind, a refund for the handset or online accounts will not be processed.

With respect to your question about mobile number cloning. I would like to confirm that 02s digital network conforms to the GSM standard of cellular communications. The standards are very secure using complex algorithms and various security codes. In addition to this, the SIM cards that hold these security codes are designed to be tamper proof and are unable to be altered in any way.

As a result of this very high security, there are no known cases of any number being cloned on any 02 GSM network world-wide.

02 have confirmed that these calls have been made from your SIM card and that you have been billed correctly.

For your information I have today placed restrictions on both the handset and SIM card, please reply if you require these to be removed. Line rental is due for the full term of your 12-month contract with O2 Online and usage to date can be viewed in the unbilled section of our website.

Were I feeling mean, I might point out the variable spelling of their two-letter company name, but I’m not. To be fair, this is at least presenting their side of the argument and displays a far greater understanding of the situation than any correspondence received thus far. The problem is that it’s wrong. The implication is obviously that I’m trying to rip them off by claiming to have sent the phone back when still using it. It’d be a bloody stupid way of scamming them, if you ask me, but then I imagine it’s been tried. I thought Ben might be amused by the never-been-cloned claim! I have replied with the following:

Hi,

If you can confirm receipt of postage, can you confirm whether you received anything from me? The phone has obviously been lost somewhere, and I can prove that something was posted. If, as you imply, I have not returned the phone, would it not be a terrible coincidence that whatever I posted got lost en route?

Why would I pretend to return a phone, then continue using it? Is it possible that, after a sim card had been assigned, the wrong sim card and phone were sent to me? Could they have got mixed up with someone else’s order? Now that you’ve put restrictions on the phone, it seems likely that somebody will phone up and complain (although if they’ve got a Nokia 6600 instead of the 7250 they ordered they may be reluctant to, I suppose).

I have deliberately not called the phone number assigned to me, as I want to avoid any communication with the “other party” who has been using the phone all this time. If you were to phone any of the numbers on the bill, or indeed the phone number itself, I promise you you’ll find that the number belongs to somebody else. This person, I would imagine, ordered a phone at a similar time to me.

Although I know this is unverifiable, I maintain that I did not even open the sim card packaging. I couldn’t have physically used the phone therefore any numbers appearing on the bill cannot have been dialled by me. I saw that it was the incorrect model and sent it back, exactly as per your instructions (certificate of postage etc.), having been unable to contact you via any method. What could/should I have done differently?

I’m not going to pay any line rental or call charges on this phone, as I never received it. I cancelled the direct debit earlier in the month and I’ve also contacted my credit card company to dispute the £199.99.

Sigh.