I emailed O2 yesterday morning and just received the following reply:

Dear O2 Customer,

Thank you for you [sic] email.

Due to technical difficulties we are unable to deal with your email at this time.

In order to resolve your query we ask that you please ring the number published on the reverse of your paper bill, where an agent will be happy to assist. We have increased the number of staff taking calls to ensure that your query is dealt with.

We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause.

It’s nice that they took nearly a day to tell me this, don’t you think? The helpline number is 50p per minute, too.

UPDATE @ 13:10: I rang the helpline, and it doesn’t work! I just get a permanent tone. This is Just Silly.